How much it hurts
I'm 16 now. I started to get bullied when I was 12.
I lost my virginity to an older guy and my parents found out. They pressed charges. He went to jail. It's a small town so everyone knew about it. Everywhere I went people would call me a "slut", "the girl who called rape" and so many other things. I would even hear adults tell their kids "Don't talk to her, you'll end up like [the guy]".
A girl I thought was my friend said the same thing to her brother when he was flirting with me. I just shook my head and walked away. When I introduce myself to strangers, it's "you're the girl who got [that guy] in jail". Even my own dad: "Nobody likes you because you have a tendency of getting guys thrown in jail". Everyone is constantly telling me how I ruined his life.
For a long time I blamed myself. Then I started to get defensive: "It's his own fault, he shouldn't have slept with me. I'm just a kid."
Now, I realise it was both of our faults and I accept that. I still get made fun of for it. Now mostly I get called a "slut" and people judge the way I look. Girls mostly.
Last week on facebook a group of girls started a group message. They were all saying mean things about the way I look and dress. They invited me to the conversation so I could read every word of it. I told them I wasn't going to sit there and be bullied and I left the conversation.
I will not let bullying get the best of me, no matter how much it hurts.
Great story. I understand your pain and frustration. You know the old saying, "Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words with never hurt me?" Well, that phrase is all wrong. Words DO hurt and they DO cause DAMAGE.
I'm not saying you should assimilate and put yourself down through what everyone says about you. What I'm saying is that those people who bully you, who tease you, have nothing better to do. By fueling the fire by acting against people who bully you, it only feeds their intentions to induce hate and fear into you. By ignoring them constantly, you ultimately extinguish the problem. People hate being ignored. And, I mean they really hate it.
Try to find a good group of friends, even if its smaller than 4 people. Try to enjoy your life. All those haters will try spending their worthless time trying to figure you out. Trust me, it's proven.