Hi and thanks for writing in. It sounds like you want more information on how you can make your first time as special and safe as possible. Deciding to have sex is a very big decision and being 100% ready is essential.

First of all, don't put too mush pressure on yourself that your first time has to be perfect. Even though this would be nice, first times can be awkward because both people are learning! This is completely normal, and usually sex gets better over time with someone you love.

For some women, having sex for the fist time can be a little painful. If your hymen (the thin layer of tissue inside the vagina) hasn't been stretched or "broken" yet, having sex can do this and some women experience a little pain and even a small amount of blood when this happens.

For women to feel like having sex they often need to be relaxed and feel safe with their partner. So take it SLOW. It my be tempting to rush, but set up a relaxed atmosphere and have lots of foreplay (e.g. touching, rubbing, kissing). This will also help to lubricate your vagina.

To keep yourself safe from STIs and unwanted pregnancy, visit your local doctor or youth health clinic. At these places you can get information on contraception and you can both get a sexual health test (which is particularity important if your boyfriend has had sex before). You can also get condoms from chemists or supermarkets. If you take care of your sexual health it will help you relax and enjoy the experience more.

Talk with your boyfriend beforehand so he knows what you want and that you need to feel relaxed and safe. For more information on contraception and local sexual health clinics, check out the Somazone services directory below.

All the best and take care.